Lads Night Out

Whilst in Port Hedland, my friends son in law insisted on taking me for a 'Lads night out' one evening.
Having not experienced a good 'beer up' since arriving in Oz, I reluctantly (not) agreed.
The place he took me to was a very large beer hall, and from first appearances seemed to be occupied almost entirely by males. Virtually the only women to be seen were barmaids pouring pints, or the dodgier looking ones cruising the tables touting for custom. (if you get my drift)
I don't suppose this was entirely surprising considering the huge volume of single guys who worked at the iron ore plant in the town. But coming from England, it is a little bit intimidating to see so many drunken guys so early in the evening.
Then the strippers arrived on can only imagine how the highly charged atmosphere of hundreds of pickled males who haven't looked at, let alone touched a women for months descended into chaos. The crowd of Aussies at the table I was sitting at thought it a real gas to try and convince the strippers on stage it was my birthday, and I should be dragged up there with them. Much to my very audible protests to the contrary. I've seen what happens to blokes when they end up on stage with strippers, and I didn't want anything to do with that...thank you!
Then one fellow who had by now had more than his tolerable alcohol limit suddenly started getting very spiteful. Up till now he'd been fine, and we were having quite a sensible chat. However he had a complete character change within minutes of his last pint. Suddenly, all the English were a bunch of blood sucking scum, and since I was the only 'dyed in the wool' Englishman in the vicinity, all of his venom was addressed at me. Now by now I'd had a good few pints as well, and I wasn't going to let this slur on my character go completely unchallenged. I leaned across the table towards him and asked in a quiet voice (or at least to me it SEEMED to be quiet) exactly where his unique claim to Australian citizenship came from. I pointed out to him that probably more than 95% of the people in this room had either parents, or grandparents originating from England, and I thought it was rather a sweeping statement to claim they all were fathered by the aforementioned scum.
That was it!!! Up he got, knocking several glasses over in the process, and made a wild swing towards me. Thankfully, he was very promptly escorted out and given a ‘talking to’ by some of his mates who hadn’t quite reached his level of hostility towards us pommes. But it brought home to me how much the English fraternity are loathed by many of those who consider themselves to be well and truly Australian. Whether it is due to the alleged 'holier than thou' English attitude, or simply because the exchange rate is very favorable to the English Pound and we can go over there and live like Kings, I don't know.

Certainly in the suburbs of Perth, the English immigrants have created almost ‘ghettos’ of typical UK type houses. Their affluence no doubt, influencing the rise in property values, and putting many homes out of reach of the relatively less affluent locals.

So, perhaps he had a point.

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