For the last 2 months, there has been some horrendous disturbances up in my loft. No, it wasn't the poltergeist revisited, but a pair of squirrels nesting up there. Much as I like wildlife, having the shit scared out of you whilst you're asleep at 4am isn't my cup of tea. So I bought some of that expanding filling foam they have been advertising on telly lately, with the intention of plugging their entrance hole this weekend.

Around 7pm last night I leisurely strolled into the bathroom to have a much needed pee. I'd just pulled my winkie out and had started to go, when a furry movement behind the back of the toilet made me nearly shit myself. I suppose I was in the right place, but standing up and doing it isn't much fun. It certainly stopped me in mid stream and we all know how hard that is, don't we lads?. Popping myself back in a bit smartish, I took a closer look. It was a dear little baby squirrel which had climbed in through the bathroom window and fell to the floor. The poor little bugger was nearly as terrified as me. I wasn't daft enough to pick it up, cos they have very sharp teeth, so we gently guided it down the stairs and out the front door. It's parents had obviously sent him in there for my nuts!!!

Why does it always happen to me???

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