Saturday night I was mugged at the back of the shopping precinct. What did he steal, no, not my wallet, the BASTARD stole my chicken jalfrezi with pillau rice and naan bread. All I had left in my hand was the plastic handle of the bag it was in. I just could not believe it was happening. It all happened so quick, he had 30 yards on me before I realised what was going on. Who in their right mind would risk getting nicked for the price of a curry? It was all caught on security camera as well. I know because I called the police and insisted they look through the tapes to verify my story. I spent an hour and a half in Fareham Police station on Sunday morning looking through mug shots to try and identify him. It took ages for the coppers to stop laughing before they realised I was serious about reporting it. If I'd caught him, I'd have torn him limb from limb.
It's not funny!!! Taking a blokes curry on a Saturday night ought to carry the death penalty.